Tell us a story about something that happened where you work (or worked).

I'll start us out with this one.




I work in a call center. We had one of the TVs on one night, set to ESPN classics. It was one of the old Lakers/Celtics games, back when Magic and Bird were both playing. They had the short shorts and all that.

This older woman stands up and asks loudly. "Whose winning the game? I got some money on this one."

I work in a self storage facility, we sell packing materials as most do.

3 days ago a lady came in to buy some boxes and asked her son to get some tape from the rack, he handed her a roll of fragile tape (tape marked fragile), she told him to put it back because it might break easily with it being fragile.


I had to leave the room.

We had some lady one-punch her ex husband.. he hasnt been current on his childsupport b/c he was paying on cases with other kids and the lady didnt know he had other kids.. the marshalls had to drag her out. It was kinda funny to me..

I worked at a place where one of the clients was the retailer 'BJs Wholesale'... I was working as Senior Production Packaging Designer and I had this Project Manager who had a lot of work that needed to be done.

One day, I asked her what was on the production floor; she told me that so-and-so had Wal-Mart packaging, and so-and-so had Home Depot packaging and then she said:

"For the life of me, I cannot remember who I gave BJs to..."

queue in laugh track

i used to work as a demonstrator. that means i was the lady at the grocery store giving away free food samples. i usually work with my mom, but i disliked it as it meant one paycheck for two people (however, the company we worked for demanded the performance of THREE people to work for this one person paycheck)

one day, mom decided to bring Darryl for a day. Darryl, you see, was at the time my older sister's boyfriend, who's a real crackhead dropout. mom just wanted to help him turn around. that day we brought him to work, he got 2 hours of sleep previously, as well as still a little strung on crack. people would look at him, then nod and smile to me. nobody commented about it, but they all thought he was my retarded cousin. as far as i cared, he WAS retarded.

i no longer work as a demonstrator, nor do i still associate with Darryl.

I had a very small, elderly woman call me a "little French witch" once because the grocery store's system refused her check. After she called me that, she demanded that I "run the check again. I have all day." Well, she'd been rude by that point, so I just said "I don't care how long you have. The nice folks in line behind you DO NOT have all day. Pay with cash or move." I had already given my two week notice at that store, so I wasn't obligated to take anyone's crap.

Edited to add: The people in line behind her looked ELATED to see someone call a customer on their bad behavior.

My parents own a few rental properties. Mostly they rent to college kids that only stick around for a year or so, but they have one housed rented to this very old, very eccentric couple that's lived there for about 15 years now. Every 6 months, by dad makes an appointment to come by the house, find stuff that needs fixing, winterize the house, or what-not. He tells the tenets they don't have to be there, that he can just let himself in.

Five years ago, my dad made the appointment for 3pm, and he's always there on time. When he got there, no one answered, so he let himself inside. The old lady was inside, stark nekkid, sitting on the couch and watching her shows.
"Did you hear me knocking?" my dad asked, averting his eyes.
"Yeah, but I wasn't dressed and I didn't think you'd come in here!" the old lady responded angrily.
She sat there and fought with him for 10 minutes before going to put clothes on.

Then last year, my dad called their house to make another appointment, but he kept getting through to a different household. He finally just went over there. When he asked if they had changed their number, the old lady responded:

"Just the last 4 digits."

When I worked for the state, I had to visit remote locations to resolve computer woes. At one fish hatchery, they were complaining that the cursors kept jumping and skipping, and asked for new mice for both computers in the office. I was there for something else, but decided to take a look.

Both were almost black with dirt, sticky with grime. The roller balls inside had chunks on them and so did the rocker bars. I cleaned off the casings and the insides, plugged them back in and both worked just fine.

All the guys were outside, cleaning raceways. Without thinking, I stepped out of the office and shouted to the boss "Hey, Tim...I cleaned both your balls. Everything's smooth now."

ahh great idea for a thread, I have worked so many random jobs I could probably come up with about 20.

To start, there was the time I was working for coast mountain sports and a guy came in to buy some bear spray. I told him he had to sign this form to show he understands that bear spray is dangerous stuff and that he knows how to use it properly. He says "I don't understand, I thought I could just spray it on my kids and it would keep the bears away". He thought that it worked like bug spray! lol

I worked at a Gym as a person who cleans people s**t... One time this guy missed the toilet and had explosive diarrhea all over the wall... I had to clean it, worst experience of my life.

I worked for a pizza delivery place when I was a teenager. One night when I was taking orders, I got a really drunk redneck on the phone.

"Thank you for calling Famous Ted's Pizza. How may I help you?"

The response? "I wanna f**king pizza."

I replied "Okay - what the f**k do you want on it?"

He decided he wanted a f**king large with f**king sausage and f**king pepperoni. I repeated his order to be sure, "f**king sausage and f**king pepperoni, anything else?" I put him on hold, wrote the ticket, got his total and picked the phone back up.

"Sir, your total is $11.47. Thank you again for choosing Famous Ted's and your order should be there in about half a god damn hour." He said "umm...ok" and hung up. I put the phone down and turned to make the pizza only to find my manager standing there wide eyed with horror at what I had said. The only thing I could think of to say in my defense was "HE started it!"

when i was a pup i worked as a baker for a mom & pop coffee shop. i'd get to work at 2am and bake till 7am when we opened. this night i get to work @ 158am and crank up the music and start my baking. the music was so loud i never hear the phone ring, but at appox. 337am 12 cops kick in both the front and back door with guns drawn. i scream like a lil girl with a skinned knee. and put my hands up. the big ol' cop in front looks me square in the eye and says "What you got in your hand boy?!" and I say in a weak voice," its a scone sir!" the clever policeman retorts, "does it have fruit in it?" and i say at the point of passing out "no chocolate chips sir". he holsters his gun and says " I'm gonna have to relieve you of that scone son!" and he took the scone and walked away. I thought for sure no one would believe this story but as i was being questioned why i didnt answer the phone or the numerous loud knocks, i saw my brother standing outside smiling and waving at me. I never got him that good......yet!

I too have... ummm... Mouse issues....

Can you come and help me?

UM sure...if you want I'll help. but i got to warn ya i got some big strong calloused hands. but I can help you with your *ahem* Mouse issues!

As a kid in High School I worked at the local grocery store that was attached to a Drug Store, by a common wall and common parking lot.

I was out gathering carts one night when I see a man running towards me full-tilt, holding a brown bag like a pizza box, with change spilling out of it. Hot on his heels was the drug store security guard, who also happened to be a city cop during the day.

It seems our fleet footed friend had just robbed the Drug Store next door and had stuffed the whole cash drawer inside a brown bag.

As I sorta knew the security guard, without thinking, I point and gesture at the thief as if to say- "You want me to chase?" and he yells "Yes, dammit! Stop him!" So, being the unarmed 17 year old idiot that I was, I turn and give chase, my white apron flapping as we rounded the corner of the building.

At this point, Mr. Bag-o-cash wheels around and something in his hand flashes under the parking lot lights. It was shiny, but pointing at a 90 degree angle from the top of his fist. He pauses, and stuffs in in his coat, allowing the security guard time to catch him.

I say - "He's got a weapon.." so, Skip (The guard) asks this guy if he's got a knife or a gun. He doesn't search him.

He takes him by the arm and begins escorting him back to the drug store. About half way there, our coked out friend reaches inside his jacket and pulls out his little chrome-plated .22 and pulls the trigger point-blank into Skip's chest three times.

As Skip drops, he wheels and fires randomly at me and some customers walking across the parking lot and runs like hell.

I don't remember if he took the money, but after I realized he was gone, I looked at Skip on the ground. He wasn't moving.

It wasn't until they took my statement at the station that I heard over the radio that he had died.

Wow. Crazy.

Ummm... I was going to tell my story, but after Mobase... how the hell do I tell something funny now? Holy sh*t

DUDE! That's brutal.

Sorry you had to see that, man.

I worked in a different call center prior to this one. Worked there for seven, almost eight years. Then one day a big shot from headquarters came down and told us they were closing the place down.

We were crushed. It was possibly the most enjoyable place to work ever. Surveys over the phone. Everyone was real cool, we had a lot of fun there.

Anyway, I figured that during the last 45 days that we would be open I was going to do something to both lighten the mood and line my pockets with some cash.

So I bought a few cases of beer and sold it out of my trunk for a dollar a bottle. It was great.

I had a male coworker expose his boner to me, and then later he ejaculated on a female coworkers office chair.

...