So you have met Moe?

No, it was Mobase. After that we ran away together, it was the chair that won me over.

Oh s**t! There must be more to that story.

Alot more to the story but more boring details. I was new at the company- a service writer for a Caterpillar dealer in their truck engine division. He was the other service writer and left an hour before me. Second shift shop techs started at the time he left, but he would always hang around. I was seated, he walked up next to me. It was eye level. First I thought he went to the men's room and forgot to zip it up but then I realized that he probably wouldn't have a boner if that was the case. He also had a file folder in his hand. As soon as he heard a second shift tech open the office door, he conveniently put the file in front of him. I told one person because I was freaked out. I had been there a few months. He had worked there 15 years. I was afraid that no one would believe me being the newbie, and I would be seen as trying to stir up trouble. A few weeks after, he knew some sales people were coming back for an evening meeting. The one salesperson was a woman and he would always hang in her office. As they were all pulling in for the meeting, he was just pulling out of the parking lot. She walked in her office and noticed something on her chair and got a male salesperson who realized it was what she thought it was. They locked her chair in the closet as evidence. Next day she asked me to meet her in the back of the shop and told me all the details. He had been calling her at home, leaving her voice mails. The person that I told, told her what happened to me. She asked if I would tell my story and that someone from the main office would be calling me. I had to go back into my office and work with him and act normal until I got the phone call. I was told to get up and just leave and not tell anyone where I was going, not even my boss knew what was going on. Her and I were summoned to the main office branch.

The first time I ever met the owner/president of the company was to tell him exactly what happened and all the details. They kept us there and went to our branch and fired him. They also called police and told her and I that if we wanted to file charges, the company would stand behind us 100%. The company had 8 branch offices. News spread like wild fire. I think for awhile the company was worried about a lawsuit. Once the initial shock for everyone cooled off, it was then a running joke that someone saw him working at Excitement video.

He had also offered to give me spending money when I went on vacation. I declined. If stress was running high on a particular workday, he would come up behind me and rub my shoulders. He was just a little weasely thing. I could have kicked his ass! Maybe I should have.

6 years after the incident, we moved to a new building, and that chair was still locked in the same closet.

wow horse...
That is the most f**ked up story I have ever heard.

I have a very soft girly voice. I had just gotten out of my initial training at this call center, my first job, and I was really nervous. "Was there anything else I could help you with, sir?"
"No, you did just fine... for a 12 year old."

Show off! Ya always gotta try and go one better eh?! lol Seriously though, that's f**ked up.

I have an interesting work story that involves a football, a co-workers head, his desk and missing front teeth but I'll save that for another time.

By the way mobase, I think I may have found the guy who robbed the drug store...



Seems to be from the right era :D

At my previous workplace I had a customer called up for a quote. I had to take a message and his name was Rudy Anas. I was giggling inside my head.

My first real job was selling copiers. There was a gynecologist in my territory who was a current customer so I had to go and introduce myself.

This wasn't easy. Sitting in his office, trying to keep a straight face, as I went over his account.

His name was Dr. Harry C. Beaver.

I used to work for A.B. Dick Company.
/'nuff said.

Once, when I worked a call center, a caller called just tell me a joke. It was a super lame joke, but the concept of calling a 1-800 number just to tell a joke was nice :)

I work at the quilt shop that Zach's mom co-owns part time. There is this old bitty named Mary that goes in and the only person that can handle her is Zach's mom. I had heard stories about her and when I finally actually got to see her, she lived up to the stories I've heard.

Here are some Mary quotes:

-You should frost your hair again.
--I've never frosted my hair.
-No, you did and you should do it again.

-You should go to my hair dresser, but you can afford my hair dresser.

(Zach's mom): This is my soon-to-be daughter-in-law
-Is she pregnant?

(In reference to me again): Was she raised right or did you have to finish raising her?

-You look fat in that picture.

I really wish I could remember some more. When she walks in, everybody mysteriously winds up in the back of the store.

I personally took this photo in Pittsburgh. I did not work there, but just thought it was an interesting pic.

When I was in college, I worked in the computer lab as a tutor for my workstudy.

I was helping this one woman with her graphics assignment. I took over the mouse to show her something and when I moved the mouse down, the arrow moved up. I'm like, wtf? Then I moved it up and the arrow went down, moved it right the arrow went left.

I looked down and and said to her "Your mouse is upside down". (I don't think I laughed, I was trying to be professional).

She said to me, "Well, I'm used to it that way now."

I couldn't believe it. I don't know if she was just saying that because she was too embarrassed or if she is to this day using her mouse upside down.

While I was working computer support, we got a safety notice about people chaining power strips together (ie, one to the wall, one plugged into that one) and had to check every station to make sure no one was doing it. I did a walk through, and discovered just one...The Assistant Director. He had 6 power strips chained together going from the wall outlet all the way around his desk to the computer underneath. On prompting, he explained that he didn't want to have a cord going through the provided hole in his desk--it looked tacky.

I know this is cliched, but I really did have a woman complain that her computer was broken, it wouldn't turn on. When I went to check,I discovered that the power strip wasn't plugged in. Plugged it in, voila! Just like magic.

A week later, she called back, same problem. I asked if she'd checked the power strip. She said she had, and it was plugged in, but the light didn't come on when she clicked the button. So, thinking it was a dead strip, I grabbed a new one and went to check.

When I got there, I discovered that the power strip was in fact plugged in...To itself. I bit my tongue hard enough to draw blood to avoid laughing hysterically.

on wednesday, for about an hour, i was under this building trying to locate some ducting, and as the sun was blazing in the sky, and the undercroft was so nice and cold, i started nodding off and having weird fantasy pot holing dreams, which were interupted every five mins by my workmate shouting me about something... Damn him! I was close to finding that demon in the hole!

I don't want to turn this into a "Companies with funny names" thread, but these people had a smart business idea.

Worst comedy name I had to deal with was when I worked for a cable company. My usual call routine was to get account number first then ask the caller to confirm their name and address for DPA purposes.

The way our system worked usually meant that there was a lag between entering the account number and the details coming up on screen. I usually used this gap to ask for the name/address etc. - made it smoother.

So that meant the customer was talking when the name came up - this was good. I don't remember which came first, her saying her name or reading it, but as soon as I was aware of it I had to slide the mute switch on my headset because I'd started to giggle. I used the time that she was telling me her address to compose myself, get it back together. Once she was done, from my tone of voice you would never know I'd found anything amusing.

Unfortunately I set the person sat next to me off laughing, which in turn set me off again when I said:

"OK then, Miss Moist, what can I do for you?"

The personal hygiene thread reminded me of a work-related story.


I was working for the government in the field one summer, and us girls in camp had a leg-hair growing competition. I didn't shave or wax my legs for 4 months. My legs looked pretty manly, I'll tell you! When I got back home, I couldn't get a waxing appointment immediately, so I decided to shave the legs. My legs were so hairy that it took two razors to shave them. I think this is hilarious, but most people find it disgusting.

I once had an interview with a woman who said things like "I like cat" and "I seen it". She asked me to write my daily routine on a piece of paper in cursive. Who makes applicants write in cursive? She gave me a paper that she had typed up for me to read about the job description. I wish I had a copy; this woman had no grasp of the English language, and she was born and raised here.