Hope you don't mind IP-gave ya an upvote too!
I feel so violated....]]>
Hope you don't mind IP-gave ya an upvote too!
Now I'm really shutting down.
Hope you don't mind IP-gave ya an upvote too!
Now I'm really shutting down.
I'm moving tomorrow (no kidding) so I have to disconnect my laptop NOW or I will never get offline.
I'll be out of touch probably for the next couple of days.
So play nice and have fun. Post lots of cool things for me to read when I get back.Oh you dork. This could have had a thread of it's own. I was just about to PM you one of those things that only Suebe can be told too! Agh! I'll still send it to you though :)
Have fun moving and come back soon!]]>
I'm moving tomorrow (no kidding) so I have to disconnect my laptop NOW or I will never get offline.
I'll be out of touch probably for the next couple of days.
So play nice and have fun. Post lots of cool things for me to read when I get back.So instead of just starting a new thread, so that everyone will immediately check in when they see that it was started by you with an appropriate thread title, you randomly pick this one to post a comment not even remotely related to the thread, so that many of the people that you want to know about your current situation will not see it and wonder where the heck Suebe is and if she's OK and maybe start a bunch of "Where's Suebe? I hope she's OK. Has anybody else talked to her? Maybe somebody should call her and check on her. Have you heard from her Bornbad? Do you have her number? I think I read somewhere that you did." type of threads?
Cool! You did good.
Hope your move is uneventful and you get back to us soon.]]>
I'm moving tomorrow (no kidding) so I have to disconnect my laptop NOW or I will never get offline.
I'll be out of touch probably for the next couple of days.
So play nice and have fun. Post lots of cool things for me to read when I get back.Good luck!]]>
I'm moving tomorrow (no kidding) so I have to disconnect my laptop NOW or I will never get offline.
I'll be out of touch probably for the next couple of days.
So play nice and have fun. Post lots of cool things for me to read when I get back.]]>
He said "doody!"Every morning, somewhere between 6 and 7 AM, I get great satisfaction from doing my doody.]]>
Best Out of office replies...
1. I am currently out of the office at a job interview and will reply to you if I fail to get the position. Please be prepared for my mood.
2. You are receiving this automatic notification because I am out of the office. If I was in, chances are you wouldn't have received anything at all.
3. Sorry to have missed you, but I'm at the doctor's having my brain and heart removed so I can be promoted to our management team.
4. I will be unable to delete all the e-mails you send me until I return from vacation. Please be patient, and your mail will be deleted in the order it was received.
5. Thank you for your e-mail. Your credit card has been charged $5.99 for the first 10 words and $1.99 for each additional word in your message.
6 . Thank you for your message, which has been added to a queuing system. You are currently in 352nd place, and can expect to receive a reply in approximately 19 weeks.]]>
The defence attorney asks; "Juror #9...have you ever been the victim of a violent crime?"
hOOsker; "Yes"
The defence attorney: Do you feel you could be impartial in your decisions here?"
hOOsker; "No"
at this time the judge chimes in...
judge; "Umm, excuse me juror #9...you say you can not be an impartial juror?
hOOsker; "No"
judge; "juror #9, are you serious?"
hOOsker; "Yes, and before anyone asks me the same question again...does this court wish my answers to be honest?"
judge; "Yes"
The defence attorney waited until the end of the following day to excuse me...I think she was being a jerk.]]>
He said "doody!"]]>
A great attorney will be able to plee his/her case and change the mind of jurors regardless of bias...
But then I should have posted this in the Perfect World thread.]]>
For those of you with limited math skills, that means they needed to pick 120 people for the 4 jury panels and 130 people would go home.
The County Clerk got up and started calling names for the first Felony case. She called 40 names. Mine was not one of them. She told them to take a 15 minute break and go upstairs to courtroom "3A" as their trial was starting at 9:00 AM.
Then the Count Clerk started calling names for the second Felony case. She called another 40 names. Again, mine was not one of them. She told them to take a 15 minute break and go upstairs to courtroom "3B" as their trial was starting at 9:00 AM.
She began calling names for the first misdemeanor case. She called 20 names. Nope...I'm not one of them. She told them to take a 20 minute break and go downstairs to courtroom "1A" as their trial was starting at 9:30.
So, they needed 20 more names and there was 150 people left.
She called 16 names. The 17th was mine. I was picked for the second misdemeanor case. She told us to come back at 2:00 PM.
WHAT? It was 8:50 AM! I live on the edge of the county and my drive was about 40 minutes one way!
Well, I have a brother that lives close by. So I call him to see if he wanted to do lunch. He does, but I've got to keep myself entertained until noon. (He's at work)
So, I meander around the mall until close to noon, head over to his work, and we do lunch.
I'm back at the courthouse around 1:30 and read my book. Everyone is there at 2:00....and we wait. Finally, at 2:40, they come and get us and take us down to courtroom "1B".
Like I said, I'm juror #17. They only need 6. The chances of me being picked is very slim. They would have to eliminate 11 people before me first.
But, I have to listen to the prosecuting and defense attorneys first. Each gets to talk and ask very generic questions for 45 minutes.
About 20 minutes into the prosecuting attorney's statements....the fire alarm goes off. We have to evacuate the building.
We're standing outside and we get hit with a patented Texas Sneak Attack Rain Storm™.
We get the all-clear to come back into the building. (The alarm was tripped by the construction crew in the basement). But, we have to go BACK through the metal detectors. To get everyone in the courthouse BACK through the detectors takes quite a while.
We get back into the courtroom and the prosecuting attorney starts back up and gets another 25 minutes.
Then the defense attorney gets his 45 minutes.
Then we're asked to leave while they pick the jury.
About 20 minutes later, we're asked to come back in.
They pick the 6 jurors out of the first 9 people. I'm 8 away from being picked.
They thank us for our time and we're sent home.
I leave the courthouse at 5:30 (Just in time for rush hour traffic) and get home at almost 7:00 PM.
Then 3 weeks later, I get a check for $6.00.
So, I guess I will wait another 7 years before I get called again.]]>
If your query is urgent please use the downvote button to the right ---->]]>
On my return I will delete this, and every other email I've received without reading any of them.]]>
"I have been selected to participate in perpetuating the corruption that is the USA justice system. The guy is probably guilty, but due to the fact that his attorney is really good and will get him off on a technicallity, no matter how much I cry to my fellow jurers, in the end we will be hung and declare a miss trial. If you need immediate assistance..."
Has happened to me...]]>
Out Of Office - Threadjack by suebe | < 1 > |
So, instead of the normal "I'll be out of the office", I wanted something with a little pizazz.
Here's what I got.
"I have been selected to fulfill and important duty of citizenship - Jury Duty. Although I'm sure the defendant is probably guilty, I will sit and listen to the entire case before I throw the book at him.
Until we 12 civil servants reach our unanimous decision, I will be out of the office. I'm pretty sure the judge won't let me take in my blackberry, so I won't have any access to email or voice mail during the time I'm diligently serving my country. So, if you need immediate assistance, please send your request to the following..
"
So - what do you think?
As a fun game (and to help future Out of Office writers), let's write some good, BUSINESS APPROPRIATE Out of Office message for email and/or voice mail.]]>