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Would You Marry Your Pet?
Would You Marry Your Pet?
You love your precious little snookums. Would you let him/her live in sin? Of course not. Do the right thing and marry your pet.
Full of stories, pictures, and more to make that special day Glorious. picked by 2manyusernames 1 month ago
tags marry marriage humor animal
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 quote edit #1 
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19
 indisgui...
1 month ago
whiskey tango foxtrot! are they serious?
256
quote #2
4
 zw100
1 month ago
Why not? If we can change the definition of marriage to include same sex marriages then why not your pet/car/toaster or anything that you love.

It doesn't mean anything anyway.
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quote #3
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 2manyuse...
1 month ago
And if the magic fades away there is always:

Click here to show image


DivorceYourPet.Com
Call yourself a pet lover? So what if kitty's having an affair with your neighbour, or Fido's too busy on e-bay to give you quality time. For better or worse remember...?
Clearly it's time to put the spice back into your marriage. Check out the links below, ask Adrian for help with any problems, and go and book a weekend away for two.


Good luck and remember:

Marriage is for life if your pet is the wife.
- Matilda
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quote #4
26
 Rowangre...
1 month ago
« zw100 : Why not? If we can change the definition of marriage to include same sex marriages then why not your pet/car/toaster or anything that you love.

It doesn't mean anything anyway.
Insulting, much?
93
quote #5
About Plime
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16
 bingo
1 month ago
O_O

Shouldn't this be in the WTF? category?
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quote #6
20
 KERObero...
1 month ago
« bingo : O_O

Shouldn't this be in the WTF? category?
If there was a WFT? Category... -_-
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quote #7
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 2manyuse...
1 month ago
« bingo : O_O

Shouldn't this be in the WTF? category?
Actually, it should be in the humor category if there was one. I placed in in the entertainment instead.
0
quote #8
16
 bingo
1 month ago
Jeez, I didn't even notice the categories were different. Would have the next time I put an article in.....I hope.

Maybe in 'Weird' then?
0
quote #9
19
 clscott6...
1 month ago
« Rowangrey : Insulting, much?
Hmmm.....

Notice the comment is empty now....

Convenient, I must say.
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quote #10
26
 Rowangre...
1 month ago
« clscott645 : Hmmm.....

Notice the comment is empty now....

Convenient, I must say.
And now it's back. *scratches head*
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quote #11
30
 doggyliv...
1 month ago
« Rowangrey : And now it's back. *scratches head*
I c&p'd from your response and edited it back in, either ZW100 removed it or someone else did, either way I think the comment should be there for everyone to judge and hopefully ZW will come back and enlighten us with what he/she meant by the comment.
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quote #12
20
 PulsisX
1 month ago
Can I marry a Calla Lilly?
0
quote #13
26
 Rowangre...
1 month ago
« doggylives : I c&p'd from your response and edited it back in, either ZW100 removed it or someone else did, either way I think the comment should be there for everyone to judge and hopefully ZW will come back and enlighten us with what he/she meant by the comment.
I thought we had decided that anonymous editing of other's posts was uncool.
-2
quote #14
17
 Nunkii
1 month ago
Marrying your pet? Thats some f**ked up s**t.
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quote #15
10
 Moogle
1 month ago
Short Answer: No.

Long Answer: Nah.

Conversely, each answer is the same length.
0
quote #16
20
 PulsisX
1 month ago

If you wish to marry your pet, you must read these rules and comply with them at all times:

1. This is a contract between you, your pet, and MarryYourPet. It is not recognised by a court of law.
2. This union is a marriage of minds and companionship. You have no conjugal rights.
2.1 If you want to consummate the marriage, we suggest you both share some cake. If your pet has a food allergy then a pat on the head will suffice.
3. You are not allowed to mistreat your pet in any way.
3.1 You cannot make him pick up your pants, put up with your nostril hair or use him as a general dogsbody - even if he is indeed a dog.
3.2 Just because you have a friend for life doesn't mean you can let yourself go. You may not go around in a dirty vest, scratching your nether regions. You may not get excessively fat. Just because you live with a dog doesn't mean you can behave like one. The lid of the toilet must be kept down, always replace the top on the toothpaste. If you must clip your toenails in the lounge, don't leave them in the plant pots. You may not wear unfashionable clothes or tell bad jokes. You may not embarrass your pet at any time.
4 Marriage is for life* or until your contract expires.
*You are not allowed to take the life of your pet.
4.1 If you're having a really rough patch then see a Marriage Guidance Counsellor. If you still can't get it together then may we suggest either a shrink or divorceyourpet.com*
*Please note that your pet may be entitled to half your assets and regular financial support.
5. You cannot marry your pet just to get at his money. Your dog's money will remain his own even after marriage (unless of course he wants to leave it to us - call for payment details). This does not work in reverse however. With or without a marriage contract, once you've been living together for 3 years or more, your pet is entitled to half your house. (If he's peed in more than half the house then just give it to him. You'll never get rid of the smell anyway.)
6. It is the norm for your pet to assume your surname after marriage.
6.1 If you or your pet is not happy with this, that's okay. You can call your pet whatever you like. If in doubt, we're bound to have a few suggestions, but they probably won't be polite.
7. The decision of MarryYourPet is final. If we feel that you are too boring, sad or perverted for your pet, we will not give our consent to marriage.
8. Any infringement of the above will render your contract null and void.
8.1 If you don't play with your pet regularly, tolerate his nagging and allocate him equal TV time, you could be in infringement of your contract.
8.2 MarryYourPet is not responsible for any deviations from the contract.
9. MarryYourPet can change the rules at any time, especially if this gets us out of tricky situations.
Clearly this is just people having a bit of fun. Much like this or this. Not intended for people to take seriously.
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quote #17
28
 Mershaul...
1 month ago
« Rowangrey : I thought we had decided that anonymous editing of other's posts was uncool.
There are still those out there that think censorship is okay as long as they personally think that whatever was said is detrimental to them in some way. Expect to see further censorship the bigger Plime gets. That is, unless some people band together and edit comments back in that are censored.
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quote #18
40
 2manyuse...
1 month ago
« doggylives:I c&p'd from your response and edited it back in, either ZW100 removed it or someone else did, either way I think the comment should be there for everyone to judge and hopefully ZW will come back and enlighten us with what he/she meant by the comment.
Let's see, you give me all sorts of crap because I edited the comments of a Plimate who personally attacked another with no provocation.

You quite correctly gave me crap for failing to leave my name and reason for editing.

Here you edited without such information and without anyone requesting you do so.

Perhaps he removed it because he typed out of emotion without thinking and deleted it after seeing how it was taken. It is possible that he thought twice about what he wrote after seeing the reaction to it and felt it was insulting so he removed it.

On my edit, the person refused to remove the insult.

You should listen to your own teachings, sensei.

(yes, you explained why in a comment after someone asked, but that isn't the point. That wasn't the message you were teaching me.)
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quote #19
28
 Mershaul...
1 month ago
« 2manyusernames : Let's see, you give me all sorts of crap because I edited the comments of a Plimate who personally attacked another with no provocation.

You quite correctly gave me crap for failing to leave my name and reason for editing.

Here you edited without such information and without anyone requesting you do so.

Perhaps he removed it because he typed out of emotion without thinking and deleted it after seeing how it was taken. It is possible that he thought twice about what he wrote after seeing the reaction to it and felt it was insulting so he removed it.

On my edit, the person refused to remove the insult.

You should listen to your own teachings, sensei.

(yes, you explained why in a comment after someone asked, but that isn't the point. That wasn't the message you were teaching me.)
It's infinitely more likely that someone else edited his comment out than him having feelings of remorse. If he felt so bad about typing it, he probably would have edited in an apology. On the other hand, someone censoring it wouldn't have edited in their own words at all.

At any rate, if they truly want their comments to be gone, let them speak up and say so. Until that time, I believe that Doggy has just foiled yet another attempt at censorship on Plime.
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quote #20
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 dOntEAtp...
1 month ago
I bet I know what position most of them will be in on the honeymoon.
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quote #21
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