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Prostate
Cervix
Vagina
Uterus
Doggy-style
Condom
Just words. Say them! Vuhjyyyyyyna! You know you want it!
LOL!]]>
My favorite OB/Gyn story is when I was being treated for cervical cancer while on active duty. I finally was being seen by a decent doctor at March AFB after waiting for years and finally being tortured at Balboa Naval Hospital ("You're not cooperating", said the crusty old officer/doctor who scraped away at my innards with a grapefruit spoon...)
So this Air Force doctor is going to take a picture of my cervix to see how much of it had changed cells. He focuses the camera and says, "Smile!" I STILL giggle about it! That, and he gave me anesthesia for the same procedure I had at Balboa! And after the surgery, I don't have cancer and it's been 20 years. Yay.
The scariest part for me now at the VA is the NP is over 6 feet tall, so she raises the table after I'm all situated and vulnerable. Yikes!
They do put cute large sized potholders over the stirrups so we don't get cold feet!]]>
I won't see a male gyn if I can avoid it. My first one was the one my mother used. I told him I had horrible cramps during my period and he said "Cramps are all in a woman's mind". I never went back to him.]]>
I once had a doc comment on the shape of my "parts" and how that would please my partner. I reported him to the medical board. Turns out he had other complaints filed against him. Bas**rd.Good for you! WTF is wrong with these people? I've heard similar stories from other women, too. I've pretty much sworn off ob/gyns anyways, and prefer to see a midwife now. I was never really happy with the level of care I got, or with the demeanor of the docs.]]>
I once had a doc comment on the shape of my "parts" and how that would please my partner. I reported him to the medical board. Turns out he had other complaints filed against him. Bas**rd.]]>
I had to get a pap from one female doctor that like talked me through the whole thing in this calm psychologist type voice, I don't know what it worse, psychologist voice or get in get out kind of visit.]]>
]]>Meh, back to the gutter for me.Okay... My wife's ob/gyn is a rather attractive blonde woman who isn't much older than us and for a split second during one of the checkups, I... you know... thought about it...]]>
Meh, back to the gutter for me.]]>
He was being a bit rough and I squirmed so he says to me "Oh, I'm sorry, did that hurt?" and I said, "yes, actually it did". He then says to me, "well, your having sex aren't you" in a very bitter tone.
Huh? WTF??
I was so tempted to say yea, but normally I don't ask my partner to shove a hot piece of metal spreaders up me and then spear me like a shish kabob, you b*stard.]]>
Anyways, he asks about my birth plan, and I told him what my husband and I had decided on, and his response was:
"Oh. Natural, huh? I never like the natural births. The mothers are so much more serious than the ones who have an epidural."
Yeah, he was a d**k.]]>
I've been told I have a lovely uterus by more than one gyno. I never quite know how to take it.No one has ever told me I had a lovely "anything." How should I take that?]]>
I've been told I have a lovely uterus by more than one gyno. I never quite know how to take it.]]>
After one of my gyn visits, my husband asked me how it went, and I think my response pretty much sums up how I feel about doctors: "Not good. It's too tempting to kick her in the face while she's right there."]]>
Okay, no one else is going to ask?
You marvel at how incredibly soft they are when you shake their hand or...?
*blush*]]>