My WebsiteJerry hatched alone in a bomb-tested desert roughly 20 years ago. Remarkably, he had no genetic defects despite the heavily-radiated air he breathed. A young Indian boy found the baby Jerry and took him to a gas station to trade for a Pepsi. The gas station owner gave the young Jerry to his daughter, an aspiring actress, as a present. The daughter took the young Jerry every where she went, including auditions. At one of the auditions, a reporter spotted the young hatchling and wanted to exploit him. Though being undeformed, the media quickly lost interest in the young hatchling and moved on to celebrity pregnancies and toy recalls. The young Jerry was suddenly abandoned and forgotten and went on his search for acceptance and human love. This is when he discovered the Internet, which has been his best friend ever since.Thanks, imnotyoo!Hi. I'm Jeremy. I am 19 going on 20. I live in Florida and my governor is a complete twit! Some people say I am a real NERD because I just can't enough of them NERDS ROPES! They're frickin' delicious. I am Puerto Rican and I am straight. I don't like penis... Except for my own. It is pretty HANDY (pun intended). However, gays are cool in my book. My middle name is Matthew but I hate math. Go figure. I have a big family. I guess my 'rents just like to get down! I don't like country music or techo, but I think techno country music is the cat's pajamas. Oh, and I think that Depeche Mode is a sweet-ass band!Thanks, Punthe!My Theme Song:Human Random Fact Generator Man, Human Random Fact Generator Man -Does whatever a Human Random Fact Generator Man can.Surfs the web, every night,He and Trebek are pretty tight.Look out! Here comes the Human Random Fact Generator Man!Is he smart? Listen, Bud!Match wits with him and you'll look like mud.Can he take over a thread?Take a look overhead.Hey there, there goes the Human Random Fact Generator Man!In the chill of night,He'll be washing his hair.And if I hear right,He shares birthdays with Cher!Human Random Fact Generator Man, Human Random Fact Generator Man -Friendly neighborhood Human Random Fact Generator ManWealth and fame, he's ignoredTrivia is his rewardTo him, life is a great big bang-upWherever there's a hang-upYou'll find the Human Random Fact Generator Man!

Interested in | Submitted | Liked | Commented on

Subway Fires Gay Porn Actor Posted: 1 day ago by BernardBlack
One single customer recognized Kurt Wild as a gay porn performer. This "man" who obviously hates who he is threw a hissy fit and threatened to go elsewhere to spend his $5 unless Kurt was fired. Subway was happy to oblige the bigot.
Comments: 64 Score: [-] 710 [+].

Put your face in a hole! Posted: 2 days ago by hypnotode
Your face, these holes.

I'm in the comments.
Comments: 7 Score: [-] 186 [+].

50-Foot Spider Climbs Building Posted: 4 days ago by DoggyLives
12 arachnophobia sufferers dead.....


Not really but it'd make a hell of a story
Comments: 4 Score: [-] 226 [+].

oops! Open Mike Catches Real Feelings From Republican Pundits Posted: 4 days ago by 2manyusernames
Publicly they praise Palin as McCain's choice for running mate, however privately they have other things to say...
Comments: 14 Score: [-] 689 [+].

Schools Demand Signed Declaration For Gay Students Posted: 5 days ago by funkfrost
Four schools in New Zealand, have barred students from taking same-sex partners to the prom unless they sign a contract declaring they are homosexual.
Comments: 15 Score: [-] 610 [+].

David Duchovny - Sex Addict Posted: 1 week ago by Wingnut
The X-Files actor has gone to rehab to deal with an addiction to sex. To be fair, if I was married to Tea Leoni, I'd likely have a problem too.
Comments: 15 Score: [-] 473 [+].

JPG saves baby's life Posted: 2 weeks ago by Wingnut
When Megan Santos posted a picture online of her 1-year-old daughter, a friend who saw it warned her that a shadow in the child's eye could be cancer. It turns out she was right.
Comments: 14 Score: [-] 865 [+].

Rottweiler fights dog to save boy Posted: 2 weeks ago by dork
A two year old kid was being mauled by a Pit bull terrier when a Rottweiler comes to his rescue
Comments: 18 Score: [-] 550 [+].

9 Phrases Women Use! Posted: 2 weeks ago by Jerry520
Here are 9 phrases women use that all men should be aware of at all times!
Comments: 5 Score: [-] 132 [+].

How many different ways can a charity balloon launch go wrong? Posted: 3 weeks ago by tigertony
Every balloon launched by the University of the West of England was said to represent an orphan in need.

I wonder what Plan B is?
Comments: 10 Score: [-] 420 [+].

Meet Yoda Posted: 3 weeks ago by Nateebiinature
When Valerie and Ted Rock came across a kitten with four-ears, they couldn't believe their eyes...
Comments: 10 Score: [-] 388 [+].

Breathtaking beauty of... bugs and lizards Posted: 3 weeks ago by michellu
waaaaaaau!
Comments: 14 Score: [-] 513 [+].

Giant uproar over tiny snake's name. Posted: 4 weeks ago by suebe
Barbados residents furious over naming of the world's tiniest snake. Follow up to maven's earlier post.

Just call it "Jerry".
Comments: 17 Score: [-] 492 [+].

Bernie Mac dead at 50 Posted: 1 month ago by loonytoon
Bernie Mac passed away this morning from pneumonia
Comments: 40 Score: [-] 1112 [+].

Big Girls, You Are Beautiful Posted: 1 month ago by psycmoe
...curves in all the right places. Oh yeah.

Music video in homage to the fleshy, glorious, big ladies. Fun, poppy, totally SFW. Huzzah.

God I love the jiggles!
Comments: 30 Score: [-] 331 [+].

The Vagina Festival coming to NYC Posted: 1 month ago by suebe
Do you like the way your vagina looks? vagina vérité® celebrates individuality and the beauty of all women.
Comments: 83 Score: [-] 554 [+].

Painting of topless model, banned for 60 years, still causing a stir (NSFW) Posted: 1 month ago by tigertony
Recently put on display after being locked in vault for 60 years. It's pretty tame by todays standards but the model is (GASP) holding a cigarette.
Comments: 13 Score: [-] 544 [+].

Welcome to Jowlers Posted: 1 month ago by keroberos32
Where distortion is cause for celebration!
Comments: 7 Score: [-] 349 [+].

Alabama Woman 'Crucifies' Herself in Protest Over Jailed Son's Care Posted: 2 months ago by bingo
A Decatur woman clung to a wooden cross set atop a backyard fence for hours in the summer heat to protest what she called the mistreatment of her son, who is being held in the city jail.

A poster placed on the fence in Maria Thornton's yard during Wednesday's protest declared she wouldn't eat, drink or come down from the cross until her son received help.
Comments: 6 Score: [-] 357 [+].

Star Trek - Data asks his creator a question Posted: 2 months ago by Jerry520
Brent Spiner plays a scene with himself as both Data and his creator Dr Soong.

It raises some interesting points.
Comments: 3 Score: [-] 216 [+].

Latest Insanity From Hollywood? A Remake of Rocky Horror Picture Show Posted: 2 months ago by 2manyusernames
MTV wants to use the original script and film the movie, Rocky Horror Picture Show again."I'd like to see it shown a year from this coming Halloween, but that's up to MTV," Adler said.
Comments: 27 Score: [-] 595 [+].

Largest Animal Shelter in U.S. Will House 2 Dogs Trained to Have Sex With Women Posted: 2 months ago by horsefeathers
A mixed breed and a Labrador, formerly owned by Diane Sue Whalen of Tulsa County, have been accepted by the Best Friends Animal Society in Kanab, Utah, said Barbara Williamson, spokeswoman for the animal sanctuary.

The dogs — named Lucky and Buddy — will be taken to the no-kill sanctuary next month.

Whalen, 54, and Donald Roy Seigfried, 55, were charged with felony crimes against nature after Whalen's adult son found more than 150 tapes of his mother performing sex acts with her dogs and a blue heeler owned by Seigfried. Seigfried was accused of filming the acts.

I'm at a loss for words. This is a sick world we live in.
Comments: 195 Score: [-] 865 [+].

Last year I killed a man... Posted: 2 months ago by MissWinkle
As I hit the emergency brake, I was thinking, "Please, get out of the way. Now. Please let it be a prank."
Comments: 8 Score: [-] 925 [+].

ZAP! POW! BAM! Batman arrested in London Posted: 2 months ago by deEPCHIll
Batman actor Christian Bale arrested over assault allegation
Comments: 39 Score: [-] 164 [+].

'Ode to Joy' as performed by The Muppets' Beaker Posted: 2 months ago by cactushair
Meep Meep Meep Meep Meep Meep Meep Meep Meep Meep Meep Meeeeeeeeeep Meep-Meep
Comments: 1 Score: [-] 125 [+].