The house next to mine burned down and now my home stinks like smoke.

The house next to mine burned down and now my home stinks like smoke.

The house next to mine burned down and not my home stinks like smoke.

Previously on "Retards"....

The house next to mine burned down and I set that sucker on fire just to watch it burn.

I'm going to see the Off Broadway production of Sweeney Todd on stage tonight.

Ha ha.

Cool! I saw the Broadway production with Angela Lansbury and Len Cariou.

I envy you! GAH!

*runs out to buy fan*

Oh yeah, I forgot...

The house next to mine burned down and now my home stinks like smoke.

I had to go to the hardware store today and on the way back the traffic (all 3 cars ahead of me) were making a wide berth around something in the road. I get up to it and it's a turtle, a BIG turtle. So I pull over and start walking to it, a guy driving by says "watch out it's a snapping turtle". But I figure it won't snap at me if I pick it near the back side. So I start to and it's shoots it's head out straight forward so fast I stopped that right quick. Then I noticed the claws. Like bear claws. No way I can pick this thing up without getting injured. While I'm pondering this two other girls stop and the three of us are now trying different things (sticks, nudging, pushing, letting it grab the stick so we can drag it). It's pretty fruitless and this thing is NOT happy, not happy at all. Several guys come over, offer no helpful advice, do absolutely nothing and leave. Useless.

We did finally coerce the thing back off the road and up a small hill and maybe it'll keep going in that direction.

It was a about a foot and a half long and another foot wide.

I did that once but it wasn't a snapper.
I'm proud of you and your helpers.

Hubbin is at a going away party for a co-worker. They're playing poker. There's nothing else to do, but play pokwer and drink. Oh, and sit around and try to talk with the other wives.

Brick walls are more entertaining.

And possibly brighter.

Sigh.

I love playing poker with the boys. I can never remember the rules of all the games but I have one hell of a poker face. Last time I played was at my brother's friends house. We played Hold 'Em. I got a quick lesson on the turns and forced bids (or whatever they're called). Then I proceeded to kick serious ass. One guy (the last man standing) thought he'd figured out my tell but what he figured out was my "oh you think I have a tell, well you just got suckered" and I beat him. My brother was so happy he nearly cried, he couldn't stand that guy.

That same friend of his is having a party this summer. hehehe, hope nobody spills the beans on me.

My wife and daughter went to my mother in law's for the weekend, so I got to go out with some frends last night and hang out. I stayed up really late, and hit the snooze button for about an hour this morning.

I'm probably going to go home tonight, and get some beers, and try to figure out a way to hook up my 5.1 speakers to my Xbox360 so I can play Rock Band real loud. m/

My house burned down today. There was so much smoke...

You b*****d! Now my house stinks like smoke.

Maybe because it is 4/20.

We've got 50cm of white stuff on the ground, and we will likely get 30 - 40 cm more. It's not even nice white fluffy stuff, it's cold, driving stupid little snowflakes.

It's -15 with the windchill (warm for February, stupid for late April), and the drifts are so big that I'm snowed in for the day because there's no way I'm going to shovel myself out.

Rage!! I put away my skis already!!

The house next to mine very well may have burned down but I can't see it through the blizzard.

That sucks. It is going to be 91° here today. I picked some grapefruits this morning and made a gallon of fresh juice.

DE-lish

Die.