The "What have you been feeding that dog?" thread : RSS 0.91

gammerus @ 5/18/2008 4:05:15 AM

My boyfriend farts and runs.. If I am lucky he tells me soon enough to make an escape also.

sykeo56 @ 5/18/2008 4:00:36 AM

« pocksucket : I have been to that place ^^.

But remember, kids. Drugs are bad. They make you laugh and enjoy yourself and we can't be having that.

Anyway, back to the tumping.

Belgium. What can you say about it? Great beer, sure. Waffles? No-one comes close. They're quite cunning with a sausage too.

Interpreting George Orwell's Animal Farm, they're not so good at, as this proves.

Two guffs bad, four guffs good.

WHAT?! My drunken head just exploded!

pocksucket @ 5/17/2008 7:22:19 AM

I have been to that place ^^.

But remember, kids. Drugs are bad. They make you laugh and enjoy yourself and we can't be having that.

Anyway, back to the tumping.

Belgium. What can you say about it? Great beer, sure. Waffles? No-one comes close. They're quite cunning with a sausage too.

Interpreting George Orwell's Animal Farm, they're not so good at, as this proves.

Two guffs bad, four guffs good.

sykeo56 @ 5/16/2008 2:18:05 PM

« pocksucket:I think that makes it worse. As an adult have you ever been victim to the Giggloop?

It happens when you're at an event or affair where laughing would be inappropriate.

A duty funeral is a good example - one of those funerals where you're obliged to go but you didn't really know the deceased. You compensate for not being that bothered by pasting on an extra layer of sombre.

Suddenly you're struck with either a funny thought, or the thought of a funny thought. you think to yourself "Wouldn't it be inappropriate to burst out laughing right now."

The very thought of how inappropriate it would be makes you want to laugh.

But you hold it in. You keep it down. You maintain composure.

Slowly the tide inside subsides and normality returns.

And you think to yourself "Man, that was lucky. Just think how inappropriate it would have been to laugh just then."

Which makes you want to laugh.

And that's the Giggloop.

Uh, yeah, of course! Have you ever been high?! Where you laugh hysterically at nothing other than the mere fact that you are laughing at nothing other than the mere fact that you are laughing at nothing other than the mere fact that you are laughing at nothing other than the mere fact that you are laughing at nothing.........

pocksucket @ 5/16/2008 12:34:29 PM

« sykeo56 : It didn't matter that we were in church.

I think that makes it worse. As an adult have you ever been victim to the Giggloop?

It happens when you're at an event or affair where laughing would be inappropriate.

A duty funeral is a good example - one of those funerals where you're obliged to go but you didn't really know the deceased. You compensate for not being that bothered by pasting on an extra layer of sombre.

Suddenly you're struck with either a funny thought, or the thought of a funny thought. you think to yourself "Wouldn't it be inappropriate to burst out laughing right now."

The very thought of how inappropriate it would be makes you want to laugh.

But you hold it in. You keep it down. You maintain composure.

Slowly the tide inside subsides and normality returns.

And you think to yourself "Man, that was lucky. Just think how inappropriate it would have been to laugh just then."

Which makes you want to laugh.

And that's the Giggloop.

sykeo56 @ 5/16/2008 9:53:11 AM

Has anybody here ever read the book "The BFG," (Big Friendly Giant) by Rhold Dahl? Anyway, in that book they drink a carbonated beverage called "Frobscottle," where the bubbles go down instead of up. It makes you fart instead of burp. When they farted after drinking it, they would scream out "WHOOPIEEEEEEEEEEE!!!"

Well, anyway, my mother read this book to me and my siblings, when we were young, and for about a year after, we would yell out the same thing every time we farted. So there was this one time when we were in church. We go to a quiet church that is also essentially an echo chamber. My whole family is sitting there silently, listening to the priest speak, when I suddenly, and at the top of my lungs, just belt out, "WHOOPIEEEEEEEEE!!!"

There was absolutely no containing my family's laughter. It didn't matter that we were in church. It simply could not be stopped.

Kitsune86 @ 5/16/2008 9:19:51 AM

mobase @ 5/16/2008 9:07:43 AM

« [b]h
Mobase, well, he can clear out an aisle at the store. He did at Lowe's the other night, and then quickly escaped to the men's room, leaving me to stand there while onlookers looked at me in shame.

*snicker*

TraumaMamma @ 5/15/2008 9:38:03 AM

« horsefeathers : My horse Boomer has 2 kinds. Explosive, which cause him to spook himself, and the long, drawn out, bubbly ones.

Since he had 4 lbs. of tumors removed from his bum hole, they are extremely loud. When I'm riding him and one escapes, he spooks himself, which causes him to buck, which then causes him to fart again.

I just giggle.

The Rottie's at times are silent and deadly, other times, you hear them so you can run like hell. Last night was especially bad. Silent, but he would flip his nub tail up, and let out a big sigh, then the smell would drift and hit me in the face. Apparently Rottweilers are known for their flatulence.

Polly, she does it going up the stairs, and will sometimes stop and turn and look at her butt in utter surprise.

Mobase, well, he can clear out an aisle at the store. He did at Lowe's the other night, and then quickly escaped to the men's room, leaving me to stand there while onlookers looked at me in shame.

I used to have a rottie. My ex used to wake up at nite swearing she crapped somewhere in the room and would look for a pile. It would wake us out of a dead sleep.

Gray horses are prone to tumors under the tail for some reason. My gray mare ended up having seizures a few yrs ago and we had to put her down. It was awful to watch and unexpected...She was 20. I often wonder if she had some kind of brain cancer.

horsefeathers @ 5/15/2008 9:17:07 AM

My horse Boomer has 2 kinds. Explosive, which cause him to spook himself, and the long, drawn out, bubbly ones.

Since he had 4 lbs. of tumors removed from his bum hole, they are extremely loud. When I'm riding him and one escapes, he spooks himself, which causes him to buck, which then causes him to fart again.

I just giggle.

The Rottie's at times are silent and deadly, other times, you hear them so you can run like hell. Last night was especially bad. Silent, but he would flip his nub tail up, and let out a big sigh, then the smell would drift and hit me in the face. Apparently Rottweilers are known for their flatulence.

Polly, she does it going up the stairs, and will sometimes stop and turn and look at her butt in utter surprise.

Mobase, well, he can clear out an aisle at the store. He did at Lowe's the other night, and then quickly escaped to the men's room, leaving me to stand there while onlookers looked at me in shame.

suebe @ 5/15/2008 8:55:53 AM

Lest we forget...

SkandarGraun @ 5/15/2008 8:52:13 AM

http://i244.photobucket.com/albums/gg12/spamtramp/2550d1190624227-cat-thread-aka-catu.jpg

tomphoolry @ 5/15/2008 8:40:52 AM

« IcePigs :

Oh how I miss me some Robert Tilton.

TraumaMamma @ 5/15/2008 8:15:19 AM

My dogs rip ass constantly. They are loud and squeaky.

My brother lights his farts. No matter where we are he is forever rolling on his back and either lighting it himself or his fiance will hold the lighter for him.

That's love, I tell you.

He will also fart when we are out in public. I will see him smiling (my kids and hubby do this too) in an aisle and I know I will have to move.

I adore my brother and is my kids fav uncle. He is 36 and hasn't grown up at all.

My standardbred used to fart when we cantered. Horse farts are loud and it was funny as hell.

Hubby ripped butt in church one day, during a quiet moment.EVERYONE heard it....we were sitting on wooden pews.

I was in tears, shuddering, mascara running and he told me to shut up and people were looking at us, like it was my fault in the first place.

maven @ 5/14/2008 11:27:26 PM

Maggie managed to emit an audible fart once. No real smell, but the look of surprise on her face! She whipped around and inspected her bits like they'd betrayed her.

dollyllama @ 5/14/2008 11:10:14 PM

I once fed my old cat (rest his little furry butt) B.F.R.C. or Red for short, the "juice" leftover from a can of kippers. He LOVED it.

A little while later he was purring up a storm when he jumped into my lap and settled in.

Then it hit me.

His purr got louder about the same time the smell hit me.

The paint on the walls changed colors and I swear Red had a grin. I tried to persuade him off my lap but he only shifted positions and dear mother of Thor...the carpet curled back. Tears rolled from my eyes. Part of me was afraid to move him and the other part needed oxygen. Stat.

He smiled and continued to purr.

I'm not sure how I lived to tell this story but I no longer give the cats the kipper juice.

mobase @ 5/14/2008 10:58:39 PM

I have no clever vids to post.

However- My Rottie has gas of biblical proportions. He seems immune to it, but good lord is it ever stencherrific.

He just looks confused when we run away. Poor boy.

maven @ 5/14/2008 9:57:57 PM

How can this not be here already?

leehblanc @ 5/14/2008 9:48:18 PM

I discovered about 5 years ago that I am lactose intolerant. I have spent the last 5 years finding the delicate balance between eating enough dairy to put myself in physical discomfort, or just enough to put everyone around me in physical discomfort :) It's a delicate balance

TraumaMamma @ 5/14/2008 8:37:21 PM

« IcePigs : farting preacher!

Bwhahahaaha! I love the farting preacher!

IcePigs @ 5/14/2008 8:04:04 PM

pocksucket @ 5/14/2008 8:01:50 PM

I knew this thread wouldn't fall on deaf ears...

Jerry520 @ 5/14/2008 8:00:43 PM

muppetmaker @ 5/14/2008 7:55:42 PM

pocksucket @ 5/14/2008 7:27:52 PM

Farts are funny, and that is scientific fact.

Amuse yourself here with fart related links, stories and videos.

Here's one I prepared earlier.