Four years??? Oh my goodness, that is a very long time. I worried about that with my first baby, but that child is mine all mine. she is just like me! The second looks just like me. And the third is a blond carbon of Lark. No worries. Thank heaven!

well at least they caught it semi-early on. the kids coud have gone all their lives and find out when they were, lets say, twenty. that'd be bad ooboo

I wonder if that would be worse than getting family swapped at the age of four

At age 4 though they will have fully bonded with the mother, I'm not so sure this would be a great idea, it could cause long term psychologcal damage in the kids. I'd have to agree with nicky and say it would be better to find out at an age they could fully understand it.

at least let them know but i think they should stay with the family they grew up with. I saw this show about a surogite (no idea how to spell it) mother that was still in the kids life a lot...i thought it was cool

ah i didn't think of it like that.
it'd still suck either way. lots of internal confusion.

I can't imagine having to part with the four-year old that I've nursed through sickness, whose boo-boos I've kissed and mended... the one I've read stories to at bedtime, and loved more than anything in the world...

Honestly? Were I in that situation, I don't know what I'd do. The bond that had been built over four years, you can't just take that away - from either the parents or the children involved. I'd almost say the *best* solution would be to leave the kids where they are, and for the families to become close to each other - allowing the kids on both sides to become familiar with their biological parents over time.

unfortuntly in those places women's want and needs take a vary far back seat to men.