I'm helping Suebe...

Bringe seg deres bror , vi elske alle sammen. Vi ville p gjensyn inne Valhalla

What the heck? Why the fire jumping?!? That means we have to do another funeral!

*shocked* my last mouthfull of lizard meat falls from my mouth. *I yell* "Whoa Smarty!, did that hurt lol. how much Mead have you had to drink today already?" That was the Kraziest thing i've seen all day. "What you do that for?"

ow ow ow ow! mumbles out of breathe.. "that hurt like hell!! damn spur of the momment decisions.."

"I dunno why If this wil work but I had to try.. when we were walking along the beach yesterday.. we found an apricot burried in the sand.. and after MBK took a bite of it it kinda grew back before Marz started eating it.. I dunno it was weird ask them about it.. if it doesnt work u can just burn them again afterwards.. I just had to try and bring them back if it was a small chance it might work."

"Sorry for ruining ur funeral mha and xia.." kneels over the spot where I buried them at and begins chuggin mead to dull the pain of my burnt flesh

Suddenly Killer (Smarty's dog) barks viciously and attacks Rambo (who Smarty happened to be talking to at the time). The dog leaps onto Rambo's chest, knocking him back to the ground and takes a large bite out of his chest. His jaws move up to clamp his teeth around Rambo's neck.

The teeth start to sink in...

In that moment, Smarty starts to feel some serious chills. He's so cold. He shakes, the pain of his charred flesh is intense. He drops the tankard of mead to the sand beside him and cries in pain.

"What the..?"
I watch as the dog attacks smarty and realize that he is badly burned and going into shock. I run to smartys side and slowly reach down and clench my hand around the dogs throat and toss it a good 15 feet.
"Marz, give him a bite of the fruit fast!"

Moe, who was JUST about to give in to SEG's incessant pleas and sneak off with her to an empty house for a roll in the hay, is alarmed by all the commotion. He yells out to Smarty "The hell man! Call your dog off before we have to kill it!"

At the risk of being somewhat predictable I raise my axe and swing it with all my might towards Killer.....

Ahhhhh! I feel the pain in my chest. Hopefully with my light chest armor the damage will not be too bad, but it hurts like hell. *What was smarty feeding this thing, oh yea...Mead*

I reach down to grab my shortsword...but i notice my fellow Vikings coming to my aid. I place my left hand in killers mouth. trying to relieve the pressure on my neck.

"Killer heel!! killlleerrr!!! I dind't mean appricot appricot I meant the fruit damnit!"

takes the handle side of my spear and bonks killer on the snout*

I soo forgot that was his attack command.. soo not fair, lol sorry rambo

Marz leans down near Smarty and gives him a bite of the fruit, his burns improve somewhat but are still present. Everyone watches in amazement as the fruit 'heals' itself, becoming a whole fruit.

"Have some more," Marz says to Smarty who is no longer shaking. He bites it again and his burns fade even more, almost to the point that they are gone.

Meanwhile the dog, who was attacking Rambo, bites its teeth in a little deeper; growling all the while. Keeper holds the dog but cannot rip it free without risking the dog taking Rambo's throat from him.

"Smarty, call your dog off before I put a hole in it," Sven says, aiming an arrow at it.

Killer lets his grip loose a bit, but when Smarty says Apricot twice more the dog is launched into a frenzy. It rips a chunk off of Rambo's face and throws it on the ground; Rambo is screaming in agony as the dog moves in for the kill.

"Call him off!" Sven says, pulling the bow taught.

Killer is amazingly confused. His master told him to attack. So he did. Now his master says to stop. OK he will stop. Oops now master said attack again. Twice. Cool. RAARRR! Ow, now master is hitting him on the head.

With master hitting him on the head and everyone yelling and master saying attack then stop then attack, Killer cannot deal with it. He lets Rambo loose and runs off behind the house that Moe and SEG were going to sneak off to whimpering. Perhaps master does not want to keep him anymore. That makes Killer sad.

DL's axe lands squarely on Rambo's chest. His armor brunts most of the blow, but it will leave one hell of a bruise and a couple of cracked ribs.

Ahhhhhh! Wait...I'm alive! I place my hands over my wound to try and stop the bleeding. Feeling the chunk that killer took from my face. *At least he didnt eat it* i think. "Okay noone say that A-word anymore" unless its A$$h*le to call Smarty one, lol.

Thanx for trying to kill Killer...Doggylives...as i say through shallow breathing. I'm alive and only have a couple cracked ribs to show for it.

I try to go get some of that fruit i heard the commotion over...and decide to rest.

"What the fuck was that all about!?!" Donteatpoop says from beside one of the mead casks.

[edit: Smarty alerted me that he's on puppet mode till Monday. So take comfort in that. lol]

"Dang guys, I am sorry. I forgot that apri...umm THIS fruit's name is my dog's attack command!

Shit, come here boy! Killer! Turnip! Turnip!"

Smarty runs off toward the house yelling about vegetables. He must be nuts...er wait, not nuts...veggies...er...WTF!?!?

Killer hears master calling Turnip. That can only mean one thing. DINNERTIME! YAY!!

Meanwhile Rambo lies bleeding on the ground near the fire, one of his eyes and half of his face ripped out. There are teeth marks in his neck that blood is trickling out of, a large chunk missing from his chest. He moans in pain.

From the bushes you all hear a noise.

Out step three brothers who you have never seen before. One has a bowl cut hairdo, the middle one has barely any hair at all, the the third one has this craaazy hairdo that goes around the sides of his head and looks like he was hit by lightning.

They walk up to you and the middle one says "My my, that was treMENdous! I mean it SOITENLEY had us laughing our butts off!"

The first one say "Quiet you!" and smacks him upside the head.

The third one leans over and says to the first one "Hey! Leave him alone!"

The first one grabs the third one's nose and says "Quiet grapehead, or I'll pull your non-existent brains out"

The three of them are going off like this for several minutes when all of a sudden, a steam volcano opens up beneath them and blasts hot air upwards. The blast send the three flying through the air and into the sea far far away. You hear them shouting as they fly "Woo-woo-Woo-woo-Woo-woo-Woo-woo-Woo-woo!"

The volcano then closes up and everything looks like it did before.

I see Rambo lying on the ground, f**ked up and bleeding.

Something has to be done or soon no one will be alive to further this weird civilization.

When everyone is back in the village I'm going to call a meeting in one of the huts to try sort out some kind of organization where everyone can work towards the same aim of creating a new, glorious civilization.

Might be a good idea to start making some mead too, there's not enough merry-making for my liking...

As Doggy leans over Rambo he can't help but feel a twang of guilt for hitting him in the chest with his axe. Rambo moans a little more in pain. He's hurt, not dead; but his death seems to be inevitable what with all the injuries he's suffered.

Cattle die, kindred die,
Every man is mortal:
But I know one thing that never dies,
The glory of the great dead

Rambo too is mortal but today will not be his day to die, not if I can help it.

I kneel at his side and place the axe that felled him to the ground.

"Oh great one, here lies a good and noble man. Grant please my desire to see him healed and returned to full health. A warrior such as him should not die in these circumstances, make him well so he can go on to become a great warrior"

I bow my head and wait for Odin's answer.